Thanksgiving...

"You will be made rich in every way so that you can be generous on every occasion, and through us your generosity will result in thanksgiving to God."

- 2 Corinthians 9:11

This year, more than any other, I have so much to be thankful for:

1.) I am thankful first and foremost to my God, His strength, His love, and His continuing grace, mercy and compassion.

2.) I am thankful for every day that my husband stays safe. In the chaotic climate of our world, in his dangerous line of work, each day is such a precious gift.

3.) I am thankful for a rambunctious toddler, who may sometimes drive me a little nutty, but everyday shows me the importance of a joyful spirit. I am thankful that each day she is healthy and unlike the countless children around the world, is well fed, well cared for and has a fighting chance in this crazy mixed up place.

4.) I am thankful for a family, who in spite of some of our greatest trials this past year, remains standing.

5.) I am thankful for the most amazing friends. Seriously. Most people get 1 or 2 people in their lifetime that they can call on if they need something or need to talk. I have dozens of friends like that. The kind who will do anything you ask when you live hours from family and who ultimately, become your family. I would name them all, but it would be too exhaustive of a list.

6.) I am thankful for the challenges God has given me lately. Challenges through trials. Challenges in what He has been teaching me. Challenges in what I've been reading. All forcing me to decide if I am going to really live this Christian thing out to the end or not. I am thankful that I have learned to consider it pure joy...

7.) I am thankful for a country where I don't have to fear my personal safety, that my children will have enough to eat, that I will be persecuted for my religion, that I have clean drinking water, that I will be a statistic with a deadly disease, or anything else. Instead, my fears are so frivolous and stupid, which is a bit of a curse, but it is helping me to learn to keep perspective. I am thankful for the one percent of Americans who choose to step up and keep this country from facing those fears. I am thankful for the one percent of American families who live with an ache for six months or more as their loved one is gone.

8.) I am thankful for each day, a new start, a new beginning, a new morning of mercies. Each day I have a new opportunity to try again: try to be a better mother, try to be a better wife, try to be a better human.

Right now, I am sitting in a downtown condo in Charleston, SC in what has proven to be the most un-traditional Thanksgiving we have ever had, but I am so thankful. I have such a heart of gratitude in spite of not having my best friend next to me, in spite of not being with all of my family, in spite of the tremendous amount of change and pain I've gone through this year, in spite of it all. When you can sit with a heart filled gratefulness in spite of everything that isn't going right in your life, you realize the truth about God's grace and mercy. We don't deserve anything. We deserve a whole lot of punishment for all the ways we fail. Yet, we all have so much given to us, even when our lives seem in the pit, we have so much more than so many. We just have to take the time and be grateful. Most importantly, we need to do it more than once a year, we need to do it daily.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Here's to gratefulness....

Until next time,

-C.

Your Hands....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FlL8LayF0uw

Your Hands by JJ Heller
I have unanswered prayers
I have trouble I wish wasn't there
And I have asked a thousand ways
That You would take my pain away
That You would take my pain away

I am trying to understand
How to walk this weary land
Make straight the paths that crookedly lie
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine

When my world is shaking
Heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave Your hands

When You walked upon the Earth
You healed the broken, lost, and hurt
I know You hate to see me cry
One day You will set all things right
Yea, one day You will set all things right

When my world is shaking
Heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave Your hands

Your hands
Your hands that shape the world
Are holding me, they hold me still
Your hands that shape the world
Are holding me, they hold me still

Here's to His hands...

Until next time,
-C.

Pure Joy

Alright, this post is coming to you well after midnight and running on pure Coca-Cola after a 10 o'clock chug during a chick flick. See what happens when the hubby is away. Let's see if I can keep it short and oh so sweet like that caffinated beverage that I am going to hate tomorrow morning when a certain bubbly two year old yells, "MOMMY!!!!"

I'll try to keep it more His words than mine tonight because mine are wayyyyy too hyped up on High Fructose Corn syrup and Carmel color (plus some phosphoric acid....seriously?!?!?!?)

So, I am doing a refresher course in James in my quiet time. Why? Because I love it...and it was written by Christ's own brother. Just learned that....always thought it was the apostle James. Anyway:

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. But when he asks, he must believe and not doubt, because he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That man should not think he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.
The brother in humble circumstances ought to take pride in his high position. But the one who is rich should take pride in his low position, because he will pass away like a wild flower. For the sun rises with scorching heat and withers the plant; its blossom falls and its beauty is destroyed. In the same way, the rich man will fade away even while he goes about his business. Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him."

James 1:2-12 NIV

So this is the part that keeps hitting me between the eyes. Here I've been all woe is me, look at my sacrifices as a military wife, I've had such a difficult lot as of late, etc. etc. etc. But, perhaps my seeming misfortune makes me a lot more blessed than the girl with the perfect family, a husband with a perfect work schedule, and a world where everything goes right. It's a whole heck of a lot harder to get this Christian thing in that life. It's a whole heck of a lot harder to understand Christ's suffering in that life. It's a whole heck of a lot harder to understand the need and urgency of having a savior. I know because that used to be my life.

Now, if I just described you, don't think I am knocking you or your faith in any way, shape or form. Praise God from whom all blessings flow! All I am saying is that perhaps a life riddled with trials and difficulties is more of a blessing than a curse, which totally goes against our human eye view. I mean I've felt like for over a year now, I've been standing in the middle of a rough, choppy surf and every time I stand up, I get knocked down again by a wave. But, for the first time, I've figured out that it is pure joy. Pure joy that with each wave, I keep persevering and getting back up. Pure joy that eventually this season of trials will pass and I will be so mature and so complete, that the next waves will only make me step back a little, rather than to fall over. Then, after that, the next waves will just pass me and I will remain firmly rooted.

In one years time, I have gone through a suicide attempt of a loved one, my parent's messy divorce, moving, buying a house, two deployments, getting a new job, a couple of health scares with myself and my child, and a partridge in a pear tree....Consider it pure joy.

Honestly, looking back I keep saying there is no way I can consider it pure joy, but I do. I do because I finally get a lot of things I never got before. There is a lot more joy to be considered, but I am getting there.

Here's to pure joy...

Until next time,

-C.

Falling down

So, I think it only appropriate to follow up my previous blog with a little, or perhaps alot, of grace. It is so easy to turn conviction into condemnation and we my friends, don't have to live under that oppression.

Have you ever fallen down hard? Messed something up so bad that you wondered how you or a relationship could ever recover? Completely taken an opportunity to show God's love and mercy and threw it out the window? Have you ever totally blown your witness?

I have. In big and small ways. I think my entire high school career I took a chance to bring others to Christ and threw it away for acceptance of a whole lot of lost people. There are family members I have yet to speak Christ's name to. I have gossiped when I should have stopped a conversation. I have said things to people that I thought they nor I could ever recover from. I've broken trusts, ignored hurts, caused pain, and made the words "Christ follower" a punchline to a not so funny joke. When someone has hurt me, I have lashed out instead of heaping coals of kindness on their head. I've blown it. Big time. Repeatedly. It is so easy to take those times and go into a place of self-condemnation, to say the words to our souls that Satan is just sitting on the sidelines and hoping we will say: you are not worth it, you are hopeless, you are a loser, you've failed, again.

The great thing is that we are not sinners who sometimes are righteous. In Christ, we are the righteous, who sometimes sin.

Don't believe me? Take a look:
"This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus."

-Romans 3:22-24 NIV

Do you see that? If you are a Christ follower you are always righteous by God's grace through Jesus.

I am pretty clumsy. I once fell down the last 4 steps when visiting at my mom's house because for some reason, I just thought the staircase ended. It really hurt, to say the least. But besides a bruised backside, it was an ego that smarted worse as my mom rushed to see what had happen to her 27 year old daughter who was lying on the floor in the foyer. Just fell down the stairs, ma. Why? Because I just missed a couple.

Sometimes we miss a couple of steps and land hard on our rumps. We missed doing the things we should of. We missed saying the things we should have. We just miss it.

But, before we start focusing on the fall we just took, we better start looking at the One to help us up:

"If the LORD delights in a man's way,
he makes his steps firm;
though he stumble, he will not fall,
for the LORD upholds him with his hand."

- Psalm 37:23-24 NIV

We are imperfect beings trying to imitate a perfect God. Inevitably, we are going to stumble. We are going to miss a few steps, but God is going to hold our hand and keep us from crashing and burning.

Sometimes, we can wear ourselves out by trying to live out this Christian thing with these imperfect natures. We can try to keep feeling as though we are "good enough" by the amount of good deeds we do or the number of people we bring to Christ. Now, we know faith without deeds is dead, but the truth of Christ is that we are not saved by deeds. We don't have to earn our righteousness through always finding the next step. We can fall down sometimes.

"You who are trying to be justified by law have been alienated from Christ; you have fallen away from grace. But by faith we eagerly await through the Spirit the righteousness for which we hope."

-Galatians 5:4 NIV

It is only through faith and the Holy Spirit that we are going to ever get these broken down vessels to find the right steps because frankly, in our natural selves, it just isn't in us.

Have you blown it big time? Are you holding on to your past missteps? Thank God we don't serve a god who scores us based on our own efforts! Confess your missteps, humbly apologize to those you've hurt, and then give the rest to Him. Let yourself off the hook. Don't think you are somehow bigger than God by holding on to something He has already let go of.

My prayer for each of you reading this:

"To him who is able to keep you from falling and to present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy— to the only God our Savior be glory, majesty, power and authority, through Jesus Christ our Lord, before all ages, now and forevermore! Amen."

-Jude 1:24-25

Here's to being presented without fault no matter how many times we might fall...

Until next time,

-C.

What credit is it to you?

"If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' love those who love them. And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' lend to 'sinners,' expecting to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful."

-Luke 6:32-36 NIV

Have you ever given yourself a spiritual pat on the back when you did something nice for someone? Or if you showed love to someone? Or if you unselfishing lended someone something that meant a lot to you? How often was it to someone whom you considered an enemy?

What credit is it to you? These words have been spinning around in my head as of late. I have found myself to be somewhat of a spirtual pride-filled person. I give myself spiritual pats on the back all the time. Wow, C., you really did something nice for your friend, there. Great job, C., you really showed the love of Christ to your loved one. C., I can't believe how generous you were in lending that to someone and letting them not repay you right away.

These verses make me take my hand and stop it as it starts to pat my back and move it towards spanking my backside. Even sinners can be nice to people who are nice to them. Atheists, pagans, God haters can all show love to those who love them. But, it is when we are faced with people who are unkind, mean and sometimes downright cruel to us that this Christianity thing has to stop talking the talk and start walking the walk.

God has been showing me lately that to truly follow Christ means a very difficult path:

"But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it."

-Matthew 7:14 NIV

The Bible says that very few are going to actually get this Christianity thing down. Why might you ask? Because it is hard. It is doing the thing that will never come naturally. It is giving until we have nothing. It is forgiving every time. It is showing love to those who have shown the complete opposite to us. It is going against our very nature.

Are you nice to your friends? Lend stuff with expectation of the favor being returned? Forgive those who apologize? Love those who love you back? What credit is it to you? Anyone can do that.

The real question is do you love those who have hurt you over and over again? Do you give without expectation of a returned favor? Are you kind when someone shows you meanness? If you want to start patting yourself on your spiritual back, start doing the hard things. Stop talking like a Christian and start acting like one. God knows how hard it is...

Here's to earning some extra credit...

Until next time,

-C.